Steph—-you will be the only one who grasps each line
When we were little girls we used to sing about sipping cider, now we sip our coffee before the sun
We don’t talk about what’s to come, we talk about the past. Reminiscing on our lessons, on the things that we’ve done
We laugh and we have answers—-but then, we were little girls whose dreams were lost in the patriarchy
We ponder aloud, “Who could we have been? Where could we be?” Because no matter how hard we love, this shit is still bitter tasting
“Did I ever belong to me?” I ask. She says, “No, we never did and oh my God- I was so fucking stupid.”
Don’t say that. Don’t say that; It wasn’t our choice that the system degraded us to nothingness
The only goal then was marry someone and have some children…
On our own, we held no worth
But my beautiful sister, we know now—-we know, we know, we know
We know so deeply its reshaped our bones
You know its not just keeping tabs, its using what we have, to seal up the wounds in the gaps where it stabs
That, or bleed out, bleed out—- I think they’d rather the latter than to simply sit down and ask, “What’s the matter?”
“Oh the places you’ll go and the places you’ll see,” I grew up on that shit but its forsaken me
False promises, Seuss. Don’t say that to little girls, it causes them to dream while their under the roof, or glass ceiling really
But——We are who we needed; We are who we needed. And, We have all we need, behind our eye-lids
We let Silence do it’s work and then for our kids—-we sit with it, no teaching-no preaching—just being
Can’t wake the dead with a kiss, maybe we can rouse them with our metaphorical fists
Cause I’m not ever going to stop blasting this shit, if I ever do might as well slit my wrists—-but only with a butter knife
So as not to cut too deep, I’m not letting go of this world, I don’t need it- but it needs me
I’m rambling on at this point because my coffee is getting cold, and as the warmth leaves my cup, my ideas start to fold
So now its time for me to sit here and think, of all the things that mean nothing and are everything to me
Rambled and Written by: Stacy Johnson (Day 2 Crone, 6-26-19)